So, what are you supposed to do at 2:30? I hate 2:30. By 2:30, I've used up all my best baby-entertaining material. Hilarious voices, walks in the stroller, each and every toy in the toy bin, random car rides, flap books that teach us how to do everything, you name it. By 2:30, Jacob has either already napped, or more likely these days, won't be napping without an epic struggle. And I do mean epic, like Biggie v. Tupac Hit 'em Up style epic. And to make the situation even more dire, How I Met Your Mother never comes on before 4:00 and Keeping Up with the Kardashians is only occasionally on, on a seemingly random schedule I've yet to decipher -- ahem, not that I care. And if all of that wasn't enough, at 2:30, Michelle won't be home from work for 5 more hours. How is that possible?!?
What won't I do to serve my readers? #dedication
Thus I ask again, what are you supposed to do at 2:30? I mean, everyone knows what to do at 4:20, but alas, for 2:30 there seems to be no easy answer. Luckily for all you non-working schlubs out there who can't just kick back and chow down on some bon-bons...or whatever it is working folk do in their corner offices...because a miniature human is ceaselessly propelling himself across the floor in a furious army crawl in unending pursuit of the glory that is Baptism by dog-bowl water (see above), I've been toying with a few ideas to mitigate the 2:30 problem. In random numbered list form they are as follows:
1. Make a Starbucks run. Mundane and hackneyed, I know. Also, not particularly effective or desirable from a time-killing or health perspective, but remember, we’re desperate here. I’m assuming that if you’re reading this, and thus have access to the internet, you probably live within 5 minutes of a Starbucks. However, 10 minutes of relief is better than nothing. As to the potential long-term health impact of Starbucks wares, the key is, the effects are likely long-term, and really, who wants to even think about living to see a post-Keeping Up with the Kardashians world anyway?
2. Drive around until the baby finally falls asleep…then drive around some more because once he’s asleep there’s really no other option. Granted this option is riddled by at least three problems. Let’s call them A, B, and C to keep things clear and organized.
A. Driving around for an hour or so is probably more boring than playing with the baby for the same amount of time. By playing, I of course mean stopping the inevitable attempts at one-by-one devouring of the vertical blinds. And driving is definitely more boring that listening to the Dinosaur Trains theme song on endless loop.
B. Driving around wastes gas and hurts the environment. This never fails to nag at my conscience. I really don’t need the planet’s degradation on my head, on top of everything else.
C. Driving around wastes money. Of course, if we were really worried about saving money, we probably shouldn’t have had kids in the first place.
3. Suck it up and tough it out. Not terribly appealing because it usually results in a crying mess….and the baby doesn’t like it that much either.
4. Make up some type of grooming or general baby care activity (e.g., bath, feeding, awesome hair style experimentation) that doesn’t really need doing, but can serve to fill a few minutes. We’re really grasping at straws now…
So, what are you supposed to do at 2:30? Take home point…I really have no idea.