Hello everyone, it's been awhile. I haven't posted much lately, and frankly, I don't really have much in the pipeline right now. I've been busy writing and submitting some pieces to outside outlets, so, fingers crossed I'll have some news to share soon. Worst-case scenario, I'll have a couple new pieces to post here that no one else wants. Try to contain your excitement.
But hold me fast, Hold me fast,
'Cause I'm a hopeless wanderer
The last several weekends, usually early on Sunday mornings after another harrowing night starring a restless just-turned-1-year-old, I roll out of bed, load the big guy into his car seat, and set out for a driving tour of central Florida to give Mommy an hour or two of rest. I once looked upon this as a bit of a chore, preferable to trying to keep the baby quiet in the house, but still nothing to look forward to. This past Sunday though, it felt different.
Read MoreFew things in life are quite as ridiculous as birthday parties for 1-year-olds. Think about it. Besides weddings, where else is a central protagonist of a celebratory event more irrelevant or overlooked? Nowhere. Grooms and 1-year-olds, that’s the list.
Read MoreIn honor of B’s birthday week, welcome to another installment of our new favorite series: Things B Does That Annoy Us. Just kidding! It’s definitely nothing personal; any parents out there who have had a difficult sleeper will understand the struggle. For those of you who don’t have or have never had a B, go back to watching The Bachelor on TV while eating bon-bons or whatever it is you do at night.
Read MoreSome days this whole parenting thing really sneaks up on you. It’s like routine, routine, routine, then suddenly, boom: Butterfly visit!
Read MoreWith our little guy’s first birthday fast approaching, I figured it was about time to shout him out on the old blog. Being the younger sibling can be hard; it’s definitely difficult to claim your fair share of the spotlight when yourolder brother often writes, directs, and stars in the screenplay that is our life.
Read MoreEvery good story is built around a perfect mix of comedy and tragedy. Similarly, every day of parenting has an often not so perfect mix of the same two ingredients. The days the scale tips in favor of comedy are the great ones. And when it goes the other way, well, let’s just say that’s when you’ll find me pounding the pavement at 10 p.m.
Or pounding something at least.
Read MoreTrying to reason with a 3-year-old is roughly the equivalent of simultaneously having a root canal while repeatedly banging one’s head against the wall.
Read MoreBecause there seems to be a fair amount of confusion about what two small children and a father could possibly do all day without a mother around, I wanted to take this opportunity to offer a peak behind the curtain at our typical day. Full disclosure: In true reality TV fashion, some of the events portrayed here may have been compiled from several days to produce a smoother and more enthralling narrative, a very small portion may have been exaggerated, and an even smaller portion may have been totally made up. But, I promise, at least 87% of what follows is true and accurate.
Read MoreThis humble blogger made his radio debut today, discussing my recent post about 'letting go' and other parenting matters, on The Matt Townsend Show on the BYU radio network. Here is the link to the show archive and the podcast version can also be found on iTunes. I haven't listened to it myself, but I've been told it wasn't a complete train wreck. So, we'll call that a win.
ORLANDO – More often than not, real life stories don’t come neatly packaged with storybook endings. A moment’s hesitation can undo hours of preparation. In the blink of an eye, all can be lost. This afternoon at CFE Arena on the campus of the University of Central Florida, #BigBen went toe-to-toe with reality, and reality won out, in stunning fashion.
Read MoreI made a monumental rookie mistake the other night. I attempted to fold laundry with the kids around. More than three years into the parenting game, I should have known better. That’s pretty much the equivalent of Russell Wilson throwing an interception on the goal line in the waning seconds of the Super Bowl. You just can’t have mental lapses like that.
Read MoreIt finally happened last week. I finally had that moment of clarity and inspiration that wannabe writers dream about. That game-changing idea that no one has ever had before. I was so excited; this was it!
Read MoreHave you noticed how much more enlightened classic kids’ songs like Wheels on the Bus have become?
Here’s an excerpt from a version I heard recently.
“The mommies on the bus say, ‘I love you, I love you, I love you.’ The daddies on the bus say, ‘I love you too.’ All through the town.”
Read MoreDear 20-Years-From-Now Me,
I hope this letter finds you well. My apologies for the boring opening; I don’t write a lot of letters, particularly letters to myself.
Read MoreI’m going to keep this one casual because I feel like our relationship is strong enough to handle a little unfiltered, old-school blogging! My kids were on Spring Break last week. It’s hard to believe we’re three-quarters of the way through another school year. Time sure does fly, and empires sure do crumble right before our eyes, etc.
My children have had many long, elaborate, and often incomprehensible bedtime routines. I’ve written about these rituals several times because this nightly production has been a pillar of my existence for over a decade. It takes up a lot of space in my head and sometimes causes a fair amount of stiffness in my lower back.
I was sitting by myself in my car in a shopping plaza parking lot, scrolling my phone for a moment before heading to my next destination when a mom and her two little kids took me back in time.
The tattoo artist worked meticulously but quickly on my knuckle tattoos as I sat hunched over in a straight-backed chair, my arm resting on a paint-splattered wooden table. It was one of those fuzzy days between Christmas and New Year’s when time ceases to have any meaning and our actions have zero consequences.
I was sitting by myself in my car in a shopping plaza parking lot, scrolling my phone for a moment before heading to my next destination when a mom and her two little kids took me back in time.
My three children stood together in the open space between the doors of a mostly empty subway car with bright eyes and big smiles.
My family discovered a new outdoor activity that helped us ward off the mid-summer malaise but after just a few days, bruises, bumps, and a broken-down car ended our fun.
My debut novel LOVE’S A DISASTER is out NOW and I have created a playlist of songs to accompany the book!
It’s the last day of school before Spring Break starts. You’ve just attended your child’s Field Day or Picnic Day or It’s Not Break Yet But It Kind Of Is Day and all that time spent under the blazing sun surrounded by 800 screaming children has made you a little punchy.
In the spring of 2019, less than a year before the world shut down, my wife, three kids, and I took a spring break trip from our home in Florida to the UK. Michelle and I traveled quite a bit before we had kids, including a 10-month stay in Cambridge, where I completed a one-year master’s program. Since having kids, we’ve rarely left the house, let alone the country.