How Writing Makes Me a Better Parent

How Writing Makes Me a Better Parent

Parenting is hard. It’s physically and emotionally draining. The days can feel endless, and perhaps even worse, the nights can feel even longer. Is there something longer than endless? Yes. Webster’s defines “longer than endless” as nights spent with children who don’t sleep and also the amount of time it takes for children under age seven to get dressed in the morning.

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Show-and-Tell? More Like Show-and-Dominate.

Show-and-Tell? More Like Show-and-Dominate.

For most families, preschool show-and-tell is an afterthought. Typically, the children at our school bring an assortment of seemingly random toys and items that might or might not have any connection to the weekly themes. For our family, show-and-tell is also an afterthought, but a very competitive one.

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The Rock

The Rock

There’s this game my two sons love to play every time they get out of the shower or bath. And, to be clear, I am using “game” in the loosest most 3- and 5-year-old sense of the word. Parental torture activity is another term I could use. I’m not sure when or how it started exactly, but as is often the case with kids, it quickly became an indispensable ritual.

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We’re Running Out of Time

We’re Running Out of Time

Our oldest child, Jacob, starts kindergarten next month. The public elementary school he will be attending has a Spanish immersion program in which roughly half of the school day is taught in Spanish and half in English. I was very excited when I found out about this program because I’ve always wanted my kids to master a second language. Besides having a bilingual parent, which he doesn’t, what better way to accomplish that goal than to start young? And to have it right there at his public school. Perfect.

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Boxing Days

Boxing Days

As it turns out, parenting is mostly buying stuff in giant cardboard boxes and then making room in your house for the empty cardboard boxes to live for about a month or so. Most recently for us the boxed purchase was a red car bed for our soon-to-be 3-year-old.

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January Round-Up

As we reach the end of the first week of our new nightmare reality, why not take a few moments to click on these links and read some things I wrote this month elsewhere on the internet. If you haven't read them yet, that is, or even if you have. You know you want to...

Father "Kind of Bummed" He Didn't Receive Praise From Strangers While Shopping With His Children - MockMom

6 Parenting New Year's Resolutions You're Sure to Break by 9:30 A.M. on January 1st - MockMom

How to Get Your Baby Started on Solid Foods in 10 Easy Steps - Parent.co

The Cover Letter of a Fox Applying for the Job of Hen House Guard - Robot Butt

I Fully Support This Active Volcano in My Neighborhood Because I Think We Need Change - Robot Butt

5-Year-Old Thinks Poop Joke is Hilarious - MockMom

Golden Globes "In Memoriam" Tribute Rumored to be 30-Minutes Long - MockMom (Joke is on me for this one. Turns out the Golden Globes don't even have an in memoriam. Oops.)

 

Weird Food, Inc.

Weird Food, Inc.

I realized the other day that I recently ate curry for four consecutive meals. For those of you scoring at home, it was a sweet potato, potato, and garbanzo bean curry served over Basmati rice. And yes, if you were wondering, that consecutive meal streak did include one breakfast. While I used to cook a reasonable variety of foods, this curry is about the only decent and somewhat new thing I ever make anymore. Otherwise, my repertoire is pretty stale and consists of the same three or four meals I’ve been routinely cooking for the past ten plus years. So, eating it four meals in a row doesn’t seem unreasonable. Plus, I usually don’t care what I eat these days because I have kids. Yeah, did you remember that? It’s pretty much why we’re all here.

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Poop on a Stick

Poop on a Stick

I posted on Facebook a few months ago a picture of my then 3-year-old feeding green beans (I think) off his plate to his 1-year-old brother with the caption: “That moment when you find that person in your life who will eat your green beans for you.” That was definitely a great moment for my son. Frankly, I knew it would be difficult to top. When you’re a picky eater and your brother turns out to be a human garbage disposal, that’s pretty huge. However, I think last week we might’ve surpassed it.

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Living With Small Children: A Series of Vignettes

Living With Small Children: A Series of Vignettes

Over the past few weeks I’ve been collecting some snippets of daily life to share. Because, no matter who you are, it’s always good to remember how ridiculous living with small children is. So, without making any attempt at creating any flow or narrative arc, I’m dumping them here for your reading enjoyment (or not). You might have seen some of these on my Facebook or Twitter, but let’s be honest, no you haven’t. Also, some are more or less word-for-word accurate and others are livened up a little. You can decide which are which.

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